painted scorpionfish

Guardian: Leila Trott

Parascorpaena picta

A scorpionfish can suck in an animal that is half its size in one fiftieth of a second. Just imagine sitting down next to someone at a restaurant and they order a roast turkey. It comes out on a massive platter, the person smiles politely and waits for everyone else to get their meal and then, without moving anything but their mouth (and so fast you wouldn’t see it anyway) the turkey is gone.

For people who eat fast, the expression should not be: you eat like a pig, it should be: you eat like a Scorpionfish.